I can’t believe it’s September already! Where did my summer go? And certainly, when will it start feeling like fall? I am pretty much over the humidity, and last week I felt like I was borderline heat stroke every time I set off for my early morning 10 a.m.-ish runs. Either way, just as I always do, I am taking the opportunity to start off a fresh month with a fresh new set of goals. This month though, I’m doing things a little differently than I have in the past.
This month I’m not focusing on miles or pounds.
I’m not thinking in calories or macros, “after pictures” or visible abs…
This month, my sole focus is on learning to love myself no matter what phase of my “journey” I’m in. Nurturing my mental health as well as my physical well being. Taking time to take care of me! And I encourage you to do the same!
Do you ever feel like you are in some weird purgatory of not quite being good enough?
I know that I make the healthiest possible choices for my life and that I work hard for everything that I have achieved… but as I’m still not where “I’d like to ideally be” – I almost feel subhuman sometimes. Like I don’t deserve to dress nice, because someday I will be able to fit in smaller clothes. I don’t deserve to be proud of my athletic achievements because there are people out there who are much better than I am. I don’t deserve to have fun at picnics and parties or eat birthday cake because I am still “fat” in my mind.
This stops today…
Or at least, progressive changes start today. You see, when I was overweight, I was actually a lot more confident. Ignorance was bliss for me, but once I got a little taste of the daily quest to become a better version of me, along with the layers of fat I shed, I also peeled off layers of skin leaving myself more vulnerable to feeling less than perfect. My obsession with becoming healthy became extremely UNHEALTHY. I am finally at a good place where I can see how flawed my way of thinking has been for the past few years, and start working towards being happy with my current self.
The truth is, you are you, no matter how much you weigh, no matter how fast and far you can run, no matter how heavy you can lift. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to enjoy life, you deserve to be loved. And who’s going to love you if you don’t love and take care of yourself?